From the U.S.: Husband is receiving trauma therapy.  In therapy yesterday he shared that there is domestic violence in our home and that he wants to heal and learn skills to keep this from happening.  This morning, CPS was at our door regarding DV reported yesterday

His therapist called him tonight to check in.  He told her that CPS visited us and asked her if she called them. She said no.  This has been going on for YEARS and the day he admits it to a therapist and asks for help, it’s reported but it wasn’t her?!?  Is it legal for her to lie about it?

Her first comment was “I couldn’t speak to that” which is the response I expected and then for absolutely no reason she added “No, I didn’t call them.”. It was SO hard for him to reach out for help.  He was barely making progress and had just started the process.  Now he’s scared.  The kids have never ever been in danger.  Now I understand even more why people don’t reach out.  How can he get past this sense of betrayal to move forward with therapy and heal?

I have no way of knowing if the therapist lied. It would be unusual. Therapy is built on trust, not on lies. Therapists are usually exquisitely careful about being trustworthy.

The therapist is a mandated reporter so she does have to inform CPS if there is reasonable concern about the welfare of children. But usually a therapist will talk to the client about it beforehand so the client understands both the necessity and how they can move forward together in the client’s treatment. If they can’t get past it, then usually the therapist helps the client find another therapist.

The best thing your husband can do now is go back to his therapist to talk about his worry that she lied and to address whether the two of them can work together effectively. It’s an important discussion. If he can address his fears with her, he may be making an important step in feeling that he can be successful in advocating for himself.

I wish you all well.

Dr. Marie