From a teen: From a young age I knew I was different. I was always top of my class and was often bored with school. My family situation has never been good but never abusive. I have never been social and often keep to my self. Middle school was where everything took a turn for the worst. I had horrible depression and towards the end of middle school pushed away all my emotions.
Starting high school I felt nothing. I didn’t care and even started doing bad in school. Then my grandmother whom I lived with took me out of school and we began home schooling. It was only then when I started driving my self crazy. I was left alone with my thoughts of the universe, my mortality, and even what would happen if I killed everyone one in my house. I have a god complex were I believe I’m better than everyone else because of my world views and knowledge of the world. At the time I thought I was smart enough to know it was because I was a teenager.
I now know it more than that. I have episodes where my brain goes into overdrive and my thoughts get crazier. I have a large knowledge of the world and psychology but I cant figure out what is wrong with me. My personality and thoughts tend to mold to my surroundings such as what TV I watch or who I spend time with. If anyone has any thoughts on my psychological profile or what I can do to treat it.
Thank you for writing. The fact that you are concerned is an indication that you aren’t as divorced from reality as you think. It is a smart first step to ask for help from us here at PsychCentral. But it is only a start.
You may have learned a great deal about psychology, but the fact is that you don’t have the two graduate level degrees it takes to become a psychologist. The training goes far beyond what you can learn on the internet or in the library. You deserve to get the benefit of that expertise.
It would be irresponsible of me to make a diagnosis on the basis of your letter. What I can do is tell you that you need to make an appointment with someone who can hear your whole story and do a professional assessment.
Assessment is what drives treatment. It does not do any good to start “treating” an illness if you don’t know exactly what you are treating. Once a qualified mental health counselor assesses your situation, only then will she or he make recommendations for what to do next.
I strongly urge you to make that first appointment. the symptoms you describe may be serious — or maybe not. It will at least give you peace of mind to know if you are dealing with an illness or only an active imagination born of social isolation. If there is a diagnosable illness, you will then learn your options for treatment.
I wish you well.